Not all sweetness and light

The past week has been a tough one.

• I failed an assessment. I accept that I did not plan well enough with my partner and deserved to fail. Thanks to some great teachers I have that process we botched cemented in my brain, for which I am thankful. But it was stressful and the doubt I had within myself was absolutely awful, I was embarrassed by my failure and was bitterly disappointed in myself. The support from my peers was fortifying and in the resit my partner and I got through easily. Relief.

• This is so hard to admit, but ahhh I'm going to type the words: I have been having frequent binge eating episodes again. Trying to bury or mask the anxiety I've had surrounding work and quite often the guilt I feel if I don't feel like running even though I "should".

Why is it hard to admit? Because I love eating healthy produce and honestly the majority of the time I enjoy getting out amongst it running, riding, swimming and the like. I've never regretted a run (ok one, that time my ITB went, but these things happen from time to time) but I definitely regret the overeating.

I mention running in the second dot point because I have two races coming up that I want to be prepared for. That involves training. I don't enter races to win, but to participate - that gentle reminder is useful. 

I want to nip the binging in the bud, it's gone on long enough. Possibly removing sugar from my diet triggered something. It started back then, where I started binging on nuts. At Easter time I added sugar back into my diet and didn't notice too much of a difference with regards to the bloating and gas I get on occasion, but it's since given me a wider range of products to binge on. I'm definitely more aware of sugar in products and I will attempt to minimise its presence in my diet, but not outright avoid it. 

My other issue is that usually by the time I get home from work I'm blindingly hungry. Hands down this is the danger time for binging. To avoid this I think I need to keep some kind of snack in the car/scooter than I can eat prior to going home. Sure it may be an extra 200 cals in my day, but it has to be better than an extra 1000 cals or whatever the binges add up to. Up until this very moment, that logic never crossed my mind. So there is value in (over)sharing. At least for me.

The crazy thing is apart from the occasional stress of assessments, I absolutely love the new career path, yes it's challenging, but it beats the boredom of my old job every single day. With fewer study commitments I have more time to spend with the Man which is better for our relationship. There's encouragement at work to remain fit and I have access to the most amazing gym, pool and spin bikes so training is never boring. I still have an awesome family, fabulous friends and supportive peers. Life really is good, not perfect by any means but really, really good. 

I am ready to walk down the path of healthy choices once again.

Sat; strength: 20m. Hand weights @ home.
Commute: 40m | 14.8km. Slow ride to the footy and back.

Thurs; strength: 20m. Mix of hand weights, body weights & machine.

Wed; strength: 20m. Mix of hand weights, body weights & machine.


Tues; agility: 48m. Fun! Lots of run drills and agility work.
Bike trainer: 40m spin class.

Mon; swim: 29m | 1400m | 2:09m/100m. Set involved 400, 500, 3x (50 easy, 50 hard), 200. No rhyme or reason, just good to be in the water.

Weekend snapshot

The weekend was filled with good things; dog sitting, swimming, first birthdays and pasta making.

Ride: 36:47 | 16.23km | 26.47km/hr. Commute to work! It's been forever and while this afternoon's ride was awesome, this morning's was a touch stressful given I didn't quite give myself enough time to get to work on time. Thankfully I'm a speedy changer!

Sun; swim: 35:39 | 1600m | 2:14/100m. 300 warm up, 500, 400, 100 breaststroke, 100 free
100 breaststroke, 100 free. Swam outside at Harold Holt given MSAC would have been impossible to get near due to the Grand Prix.

Just compensation?

I am suffering the effects of hay fever. It keeps me awake at night, at least the streaming eyes and nose do. I am exhausted. The past couple of days have been rough with little sleep.

The redeeming quality to this time of year is that it's mango season. I'm loving them sprinkled with a little bit of hot chili powder. I'm so looking forward to nectarines and peaches! As someone who cant tolerate too many apples & pears, the new summer fruits are a welcome addition to my diet.

Walk: 40m. I nearly fell over when the Man walked in the door just after 6pm. Usually it's just after 8:30. So we had time tonight for a neighbourhood walk. I wasn't up for much else.

Tues; run: 52m | 8km | 6:30/km. Garmin played up so distance/time an estimate. I attempted to run home. I didn't make it all the way. This run was broken into two. Mentally I was pumped to tackle the 10km, physically I didn't have it together. My calves were still sore/tired from the Vibram run. I was exhausted, it was warm, somewhat windy and I felt as though I was lacking energy even though I had some chews before running. All in all, disappointing.

Mon; kickboxing: 45m. I'm still sore from this. So many push ups.

Mon; commute: 1:10 | 20.6km |17.66km. So windy on the way home. There was one stage I swear I was being blown backwards, I had to get off my bike and walk.

Big and little

Little activity. Big news!
There may have been a champagne or two to celebrate.

I resigned yesterday. I will finish up three days short of 11 years. 11 years! It blows my tiny mind. I've documented more injury and disease (and absence of injury!) than I ever thought possible. I've loved my time in forensics, but it's time to move somewhat sideways. I've sat numeracy & literacy tests, been deemed medically, physically and psychologically fit, sat a panel interview and finally after many months of obsessively checking the mail, been accepted as a new recruit to enter the police force. I am so very ready for a new challenge. I am so excited to have a huge opportunity before me.

I said I'd make a career move this year. And finally it's done!

Run: 54:30 | 8.6km | 6:20/km. Ran sans Garmin. No feedback at all. I battled a little. Dehydration is the most likely contributor. Nice along the foreshore without the wind.

All week; strength: 10m. Just punishing my triceps with dumbbell kickbacks.
Mon; kickboxing: 45m. Another hard session, this one involving kettlebells.
Mon; commute: 1:10 | 20.6km | 17.66km. Heh, I wore my HRM. I wanted a rough estimate of calorie burnt. About 220 cal each way. Riding the Gazelle is a mix of strength & cardio. To say it's not light is an understatement.

Lunchtime activity

I'm a bandit for not leaving my desk at lunch, I usually work through. So I was pretty happy to sign up for a run at lunch time with my workmates as part of the 10000 step challenge. It was hot, windy and hard work up the Anderson St hill, but so very worth it.

Run: 22:22 | 3.8km | 5:53/km. About 2 mins off my PB for the track, but considering it was so hot and I felt like I was running backwards for the last 1.8km, I'm ok with the time.

Commute: 1:15. Seriously questioned the wisdom of taking the slow bike out on a day blowing a hot northerly headwind. Going in was awesome, coming home not so much.

Resuming normal programming

Today was a good one and I felt like me.
I was able to let go of the anxiousness that Sunday's fitness test is causing me. What will be, will be.

Started the day with a commute on the Gazelle. There is no speed option but slow, whereby you just have to enjoy being on a bike. Do I ever. Then at lunchtime there was time to abandon my desk for a river run. It was an effort, but so very worthwhile. After the work day was done I walked into the city, encountered some huge sculptures, striking against the Town Hall and Cathedral (as part of the Melbourne Festival) and ate dumplings with a friend. Finishing the day off a ride home against the backdrop of a glorious sunset in time to view The Slap. Today bought me joy.

Ride: 1:15 | 20.3km | 16.24km. It's near on impossible to be fast, but still quicker than catching the train!

Run: 21:38 | 4km | 5:25/km. Longest run post ITB injury. Added an extra km and suffered not pain. It was windy and warm out, but seriously, I think this is a PB for 4km :).

Ride to Work Day

I'm work's Ride to Work Day ambassador. I have been for years. I felt a little sham-like this year because it's been ages since I've spun the legs into work. But last night I packed my clothes, pumped up my tires and laid out my gear in anticipation for this morning, so all I had to do when I got up at ridiculous o'clock was get dressed and jump on the bike.

And you know what? It was bliss. Being so early meant fewer cars, trucks and cyclists to contend with. Plus I didn't have to sit idle for 10 mins as seems to be the norm on the train these days.

We had a great response at work with a total of 10 bikes racked. I organised a healthy breakfast, complete with bananas as a special treat for riders, which were well received.

I'm tempted to ride in again tomorrow!

Ride: 52m | 20.6km | 23.7km/hr. I had the path to myself this morning, but found this afternoon to be a little congested and as a result had to take it easy in parts.

Beep test: Level 7. Yesterday wasn't an anomaly.

Tues; beep test: Level 7. I freakin' made it, finally. It wasn't easy, but I got there. I know I am physically capable, I just have to believe it on the day.

Nothing but blue skies

The most glorious day to be on a bike. No wind! Sure I had to ride through some fairly industrial areas, but with the sun out and blue skies, I could not have been happier to be out and about, though I can certainly feel the lack of strength in my legs after neglecting the bike for so long.

Run: 1:00:25 | 9.95km | 6m04s/km. Included a 3km time trial for which I ran 16:28, which was a 20s improvement over the last time. Still feeling a little tired from the weekend's efforts.

Commute: 40m on the slow bike.

New experience

I have the Man home with me today. He was admitted to hospital on Valentines day for emergency surgery on his appendix. After a successful operation he's resting. But it's not really his forte. He had to pop into work today to make sure the guys were on track and I needed to pick up a few things from the city, so I trialled the Melbourne bike share.

Knowing full well I intended to ride I bought along my own helmet. The bike seats are easy to adjust and super easy to ride. There's a little basket at the front where you can secure a small bag. One thing though, you really have to lift the bikes out of their dock. I totally failed at that, it took me about 7 attempts before I could finally release a bike from its dock. Lesson learned!

Run: 32m 57s | 5.18km | 06m 22s/km. I wouldn't usually run two days in a row, but after the quick jaunt into the city I had time to kill so I ran to Albert Park lake. It was hot, the cloud cover had burnt off and it got warm quickly. My calves hadn't quite recovered from yesterday's run so it was painful. I haven't quite adjusted to the vibrams yet to warrant two days in a row and I really think I need to revisit my technique. I think I'm pushing from my toes too much.

Solid

I put in a solid weekend of training along the beach track and it feels good. Saturday was all about the long (it's all relative) run. I was dressed exclusively by race goodies. The hat from the portsea twilight classic and the singlet from the Australia day 10km.

Sunday I was up and at it early to avoid the heat for a bike/run session. Running to breakfast as part of a brick is where it's at!

Fri; run: 32:05 | 5km | 6m25s/km. Easy lunchtime run around the tan.
Sat; run: 1:24:43 | 12.8km | 06m 37s/km. Struggle town over 10kms it seems. Perhaps hydration and nutrition played a part. Fuel belt next time! It did not help that I had a massive blister develop in the last couple of kms.
Sun; ride/run: Bike 44m | 20km | 27.27 km/hr. Tried to push hard on the bike, but average HR doesn't indicate it at all. Run 26:15| 4.1km | 06m 24s/km. Just wanted this to be over. Trialled no socks and got another blister at the heel. Hello body glide. We'll need to get reacquainted.
Commute: 1:15 | 20.6km | 16.48 km/hr

Ice ice baby

My calves came good on Sunday, but due to time constraints I missed going for a run. Come Monday morning the Man is running super late so we have to run for the train. And *ping* something goes in my left calf. A pulled muscle, most likely. I pulled up very limp. I've laid off the running (cycling seems to be fine) and iced and iced and iced throughout yesterday and today. Fingers crossed I can have a fair crack at tomorrow's 10km Australia Day run.

Sat; swim: 12m | 500m | 2m24s/100m. Another slow open water swim
Commute: 1:15 | 20.6km | 16.48 km/hr

Back in the saddle

Busy week this one. I've been back on the Gazelle and loving it. So awesome not relying on public transport plus we've had some very pleasant cycling weather. That said the Gazelle is well and truly in need of a service. Must get onto that...

Took my Vibrams for a run/walk last night. I felt great running on grass or the slightly softer track at Albert Park, but was a little tentative on the pavement. I opted not to run the whole 8 or so km to my parents place. Instead my Dad was coerced into picking me up half way. While my legs could have kept going, I could feel blisters forming under my big toe. Definitely using some body glide next time. Good thing for the blisters really, because I'm not sure I should have done that much, I can certainly feel my calves today.

Just as well I had a massage booked. There was certainly a whole lot of tightness in my back, and when my calves were worked on they were just as painful. I'm hoping to come good for the weekend, because I know tomorrow I'll be feeling the brunt of the massage.

Tuesday full commute: 1:15 | 20.6km | 16.48 km/hr
Wednesday & Thursday one way commute: 1:15 | 20.6km | 16.48 km/hr
Wednesday run: 35:45 | 4.7km | 07m 37s/km. I actually had a chance to manually hit the lap button and saw some kms around the 6:12 mark.

Post Christmas

In my younger years I've been known to get out for a run or ride on Christmas morning. This year I could have made time but I didn't. Opting to drink coffee in bed with the man while swapping a few presents. We swore by a no present Christmas, but neither of us could resist a little something.

Christmas day was spent with my parents and bro in the city, then we headed down to the beach for Christmas night with the man's family. Good times. We retired relatively early which meant I was awake early and feeling refreshed. And the sun was out. There was no excuses it was running time and I was excited.

Felt so good not to have to be anywhere by a certain time, so I could just run. And while I didn't feel great (dehydrated towards the end), I was pretty happy to have a gorgeous morning to myself. And the people on the peninsula are so nice. Almost everyone I passed said 'good morning'!

Run: 1:09:15 | 10.5km | 06m 36s/km
Thursday commute: 40m | 7km | 14km/hr. Christmas eve errand running. Taking the bike was a godsend because you couldn't park at the supermarket!

Errands

I thought I'd ease back into the swing of things with some easy cycling. I'm feeling so much better in terms of my asthma, though I can't seem to get rid of my pesky cough. Anyway I had a few errands to run today (no work for me, I'm on leave for the next few days, woo hoo) and I thought I'd do them by bike. No rain, but plenty of wind made for some tough going all the way into the city and then along the beach. Coming home required little effort with the tailwind.

Library books returned. Check.
A dose of Vitamin D. Check.
Three pairs re-heeled boots picked up from the cobbler. Check.
Lamb shanks for the man's dinner. Check!

Commute: 2:00 | 916 KCal.

Bike house

Everyone's home! The man built our bike hub, it's pretty awesome. I long to paint it and put hooks on the side or back to hang our assorted bike things, but for the moment it's doing it's job. The best thing is it has a roll down plastic front that protects the bikes from the sawdust that's generated almost every weekend.

Commute: 52m 45s | 20.6km | 23.45km/hr. On "Pearl" the Specialized Dolce today (far right, above). Boy could I feel the my attitude shift. Racer mode! Though I notice when I'm on the Gazelle, drivers are more tolerant and give me a wide berth, but when I'm in lycra it's almost like I'm invisible. Somewhat scary.

Best laid plans

I timed my afternoon snacks perfectly. Or so I thought. I left work an hour and a half later than anticipated. I got 30 minutes into my run home before I started walking. I'd run out of energy. Literally.

Run: 33:15 | 5km | 06m 39s/km.
Walk: 55:00
Wed; commute: 1:15 | 20.6km | 16.48 km/hr. Had company. Man, the Gazelle garners its fair share of attention. Single ladies take note? An expensive way of attracting the menfolk perhaps...

That old chestnut

I ran on the other side of the river today. I almost never do. I don't know why, I just like the old out and back. Today I opted for a loop. Conditions were awesome about 17C and (clearly) overcast. My asthma on the other hand wasn't. I'm not entirely sure what I was thinking, I can barely go four hours without some puffer relief in this hayfever weather and then I go out an run. I do not miss the tightness in my chest. Lesson learned.

Commute: 1:15 |20.6km | 16.48 km/hr
Run: 36m | 5.6km | 06m 32s/km. I felt so much better than anticipated considering I haven't run since Thursday. Had to hold back because, well being able to breathe is important right?

When something better comes up

Pretty happy to get my commute in, because an impromptu dinner with friends has put paid to my evening run. I'm not that upset, it's such a balmy evening, hopefully we'll find some space in the beer garden.

Commute: 1:15 | 20.6km | 16.48km/hr. Quite cool this morning, but hot and windy on the way home.

A kindred spirit

Shopping totally used to be my sport, uh, until I took up sport. I don't love it so much anymore, there are so many other things I could be doing. But I had some time to kill before meeting the man for dinner on Friday night and I was in desperate need of some new sports bras, because I'm pretty much wearing them everyday. Anyway I made my purchases (three!) 25% off thank you very much, and walked out of the store. The security barriers beeped instantly, so I went sheepishly to the nearest counter and asked the girl there to check my stuff.

She did, saw the above purchases and then we got talking about running. She'd just gotten into it, having just run her first half marathon, how it helps her clear her mind, how it's a huge challenge. I think I was there for 15 mins, talking about our races and training. It's so nice to meet like minded people. Randomly at that!

Commute: 1:15 | 20.6km | 16.48 km/hr. First commute of the week. Very cool this morning, but a very warm ride home.

RiderLog

This was the first app I downloaded. And I finally remembered to use it today. At this stage it's specifically for commuters in Victoria, Australia. It records the basic details of your trip and anonymously uploads them to the Bicycle Network.

The information is then used to improve the planning of bike infrastructure and to convince authorities to invest more in the locations where people ride. I'm all for that. There's a few parts of my busy commute that could be made safer for sure!